Challenging all perfectionists: are you hurting your creativity and fitness?

“I’m a perfectionist,” you say with a touch of pride mingled with shyness. But is your perfectionism holding you back? Quite possibly. You see, a perfectionist won’t try anything new unless they can be ‘perfect’ at it. We are quite literally embarrassed by our own imperfections.

When we try doing a new type of exercise we’re thinking: “Oh heavens. Am I doing this right? Why is that guy looking at me? I’m making a fool of myself! Maybe I should just do what I’m good at”.

It’s even worse when it comes to creative projects. We stand poised, paintbrush, pen or musical instrument in hand and what’s going through our heads? “What if I mess up? Is anyone watching me? How should I even start this? What if it turns out mediocre?” Often, the fear overcomes us. We put the pen and paper, guitar or canvas aside and tell ourselves we’re waiting for inspiration. Yeah, right!

But we know that perfection doesn’t exist!

We’ll even say that perfection is boring. It is. So what’s with the fear of imperfection? We don’t expect others to be perfect – why should we be so unkind to ourselves? We’ll even have a preference for handmade items BECAUSE they’re a bit wonky and interesting. But when it comes to our own work, our desire for perfection paralyses us. We daren’t even try.

It’s good to aim high but…

Don’t get me wrong, it’s good to aim high, but if things don’t come out just as you planned, you also don’t need to flog yourself. I battle with my perfectionism. And I see I’m not the only one. I found a research paper

on perfectionism that says we perfectionists get depressed and stressed out easily.

Once, I knocked off a quick mood painting with black watercolour. I was just messing around. The brush strokes are rough, the proportions are all wrong. I try to keep it hidden. One day, a friend was flipping through my sketchbook.

“I love this”! She cried.

“Say what?” I was incredulous.

Yup! My most imperfect effort was the single thing in my sketchbook that really impressed her. Why? Well here’s the odd thing. She loved it because it was imperfect. It had character, it had spontaneity. Perfection? No. Personality? Yes!

Wabi-Sabi: the art of imperfection

The Japanese celebrate imperfection in the creative philosophy known as wabi-sabi. The story of its origin goes like this:

A young man wanted to become a tea master, so he approached a master and asked to be his apprentice. The tea master said that the young man should tidy his yard and if he did a good job, he might be given the opportunity to learn.

The young man went to work, raking up every fallen leaf and tidying everything until it was perfect. When he was finished, he stopped to survey the results. It didn’t look right to him. So he went over to a blooming cherry tree and shook it so that some blossoms would fall randomly to the ground.

And so, legend has it, the art of imperfection known as wabi-sabi was born. 

Wabi-sabi celebrates transience, imperfection and the incomplete. It’s a rebellion against perfection, and in that sense, it is a ‘perfect’ and beautiful revolution in the way we think.

Which brings us to this week’s challenge

Here’s your brief. Create something imperfect, transient and incomplete – or any one of these three things. Do it on purpose. If by some nearly impossible chance you create something that’s perfect, mess it up a bit.

Your project can cover a few minutes, a few hours or even a few days. The scale of what you do is up to you. Work with any medium: arrange a few flowers, make a wonky earthenware pot, go hunting for a twisted and gnarled piece of wood or a stained and rusted bit of metal, daub out a painting with a few exuberant brush strokes.

Don’t go looking at Japanese examples and try to emulate them (unless you want to). Be completely free and uninhibited.

As for your fitness program, try something new. Take on a class where others will see your imperfections and tell yourself you don’t care. Go to yoga and be the stiffest person in the class. Whatever you always wanted to try and were afraid to look bad at – tackle it. If you’re low on inspiration, go and turn some cartwheels in the back yard. Laugh at your beautiful imperfection!

Whatever your project, I challenge you to be perfectly imperfect. Good luck!

Self-Imposed Limitations: Your Biggest Barrier To Achieving Your Creative And Fitness Goals

“One should never be nervous about being asked to tackle anything. One has all the power necessary to achieve everything within oneself. It is only necessary to remember the power. If people are nervous, it is because they forget their potentialities and remember only their limitations”.

(Frank Lloyd Wright)

Do you remember that invincible feeling you had when you were just a kid? You drew, you painted and you never criticized yourself. As for physical challenges, you were ready to try anything, sometimes alarming your parents with your dare-devil feats. 

Then You Grew Up.

When last did you accept one of your own creative efforts as being ‘just fine’? When last did you so much as try to do a cartwheel? What happened? You’re stronger, more co-ordinated and your sense of aesthetics is more developed than it was back then, but a simple box-jump leaves you sweaty-palmed with the fear of failure, and when you look at a blank canvas, you find yourself afraid to make that first mark or brush-stroke on the pristine white surface.

What Happened?

Did your friends tell you to stop playing on the jungle gym and ‘grow up’? Did your art teacher at school critique your work after you put in a huge effort? Did your parents stop getting enthusiastic about your artistic efforts and resort to a brief glance and a bored “Uh-huh, that’s nice”?

But Who’s Holding You Back Now? 

Deep down, you already know who your fiercest critic is. That’s right, there’s only one person who limits your creativity and who makes you fear your fitness goals, and that’s you! Your biggest fear is ‘failure’ , your own imperfections scare you until you’d rather not even try. You look at that box-jump and say “I’m too old to do that”, you look at the canvas and say “I’m not creative enough”. The result? A self-fulfilling prophecy that prevents you from exploring your real potential for creativity and fitness.

Unleash Your Potential!

Of course, there will be things that you simply cannot do right now, but as long as they’re not physically impossible, you can work your way up and ultimately achieve your goals. For example, you may not be ready to run a marathon, but if you train regularly, you will reach the point where you can. You may need to work on your technique with watercolors, oils, or the simple lead-pencil, but if you allow yourself to try, and keep at it, wonderful things can happen. 

“I Can’t” or “I Won’t”?

We often claim that we want to achieve this or that goal, but then we add two little words: “I can’t”. These are powerful words. They’re almost like a magic spell, because they come true from the moment you say them. They’re born of fear. Either that, or maybe you don’t really want to achieve that goal after all. In that case, you should be saying “I won’t” or “I’d rather not try” instead of “I can’t”.

There’s Nothing Wrong With Not Wanting To Try Something. 

But there’s a big difference between lacking the desire to try and not being physically able to do something. If you have a fear of heights, you may not want to try bungee-jumping, but saying that you can’t do it is obviously not true. Bungee jumping is as easy as falling off a bridge with a line attached to you. What’s really stopping you? Fear!

Overcoming Fear

The first step to overcoming your fear of failure is to recognize that it’s there. Now ask yourself how much you really want to achieve your goals. The more you want to achieve a result, the more willing you will be to tackle the painful process of overcoming your fear. 

Don’t think that all it’s going to take is an Ah-Ha moment. You have created a “Can’t do” conditioning, and you’re going to have to overcome that. You will be outside of your comfort-zone. You’ll be sweating bullets at the gym or on your run, you’ll be making those first, hesitant brush-strokes on the canvas. You’ll pick up your musical instrument for the first time and it isn’t going to sound particularly good when you play.

Accept yourself and know that you can!

You won’t be a master at what you do the minute you begin, but know that you can achieve your goals, and accept the learning curve it may take to get where you want to be as an enjoyable part of the process. Try a lower box-jump: too easy? Now try that one that frightened you! You will find that you’re capable of a lot more than you ever gave yourself credit for – but you have to put your self-imposed limitations aside and take the plunge!

You Don’t Have To Be ‘Perfect’

Have you told yourself that you have to be perfect? Poor you! And yet you accept the imperfections of others. Sure, a handmade pottery bowl isn’t 100% symmetrical, but you are able to realize that this is part of its charm – unless you made it yourself! Then all you see is its ‘imperfections’. That’s if you were even able to bring yourself to try your hand at pottery. 

Be a little kinder to yourself. What are you really good at? What if someone else wanted to learn to do the same thing – what would you tell them? You’d tell them to keep trying and have fun while they’re at it! Your confidence will grow as you expand your physical and creative abilities – or you can stay just as you are – the choice is yours!

What Led To The Creation of Sleeping Otters Studio

Since childhood I have always had a love for art and sports.

Throughout school art and sports were the only subjects that held my attention, but instead of going to college right after high school and pursuing art, I joined the Army. 

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Now I played a ton of sports up until that point but it was during bootcamp where I was first introduced to regimented running and calisthenics. Through eye-squinting heat waves in the day, blistering cold brisk air at night, or even (my favorite) spa days full of rain and slick mud. I pushed myself and loved minute of the physical challenges. All of this led to my search for more. 

At first I would just go to the gym and walk from machine to machine, thinking that I was doing something effective. Boy was I clueless. Still, I enjoyed putting in the time and I felt good doing it. Then in 2008, I was introduced to this thing called CrossFit. “Whoa bro, WTF just happened?” T-Rex arms (a guaranteed side effect of your first week doing CrossFit) and all after my first WOD (workout of the day), I couldn’t resist coming back. There was something about the extreme physical exertion and shared pain with those around me, that made it worthwhile. In fact it made it great. As with many newbie CrossFitters who have no real weight training experience, you don’t question anything.

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Fight Gone Bad... or well...? 

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You just do. And "do", I did well. I even went through the CF Level 1 certification and started preaching CrossFit to whoever would listen. I wholeheartedly enjoyed doing it, and showing others how to use it to achieve their own fitness goals. I helped numerous soldiers succeed in the battle against obesity. This allowed them to return back to the workforce and become an effective part of the military again. The camaraderie that was built between each client and I is something that I hold dear to my heart till this day. 

As my journey through fitness continued I wanted to try new things. Not that CrossFit didn’t change everyday but I wanted to see if I would enjoy something else. I tried bodybuilding and competed in my first figure competition in October 2010. For my contest prep I hired a trainer and it was during that time that my eyes were open to the intricacies of what it truly meant to be a bodybuilder. The amount of time someone puts into working towards a competition is ridiculous and I admire all those who compete regularly. 

Lastly, for now, I tried powerlifting. Where have you been all my life? First off if you know me then you know that I love to lift heavy things and put them down. Lift, down, repeat. So it didn’t surprise me that I fell in love with the sport. I competed in my first competition in December 2014 in Pennsylvania and walked away with a state record! Woot Woot! The reason I haven’t competed again since then is because I found out I was 6 weeks pregnant at the time! Yea pretty nuts. My son was born late June and I am now working my way to getting my strength back. As any mom knows, it is a daunting task but I’m loving every minute of the work, sweat, and exertion. I will be back in shape asap! 

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Now it's been a couple years since I've been out of the military. Since my release I have been going to school for my other passion, art. I decided to dive right in and see if I could really make what I love into a career. But don't think I've forgotten about my other love, fitness... Are you kidding me? Never. Which brings me to my third-most loved baby.

Meathead.

Through Meathead I was able to combine both my passions. I wanted to create something that people could enjoy no matter what type of fitness they participate in. 

Throughout my fitness journey I have encountered numerous examples of the stereotypical meathead as I'm sure you have as well. I've seen things they do in the gym that I can't comprehend. Meathead thinks he's a force to be reckoned with. A tier one bodybuilder and guru of all things fitness. According to him his bro science is guaranteed to produce results. In his mind no amount of scientific fact will out rule grueling hard work and endless training. 

But there is just something about him that draws people to him. Wherever he goes people flock. Maybe it's his type A personality, or his charismatic smile. He probably wants to think that it's his 22 inch biceps. Either way, he is someone that you want to follow. 

Join me next time to find out who Meathead truly is. 

Thanks for reading.

www.sleepingottersstudio.com